Melt Down

I had a bit of a melt down this afternoon.

We were at as training thing for volunteers for our front desk when we run Swancon, and the room just felt so small and suffocating and F U L L of people.

People I know. People I have known for years but that didn’t seem to matter.

It wasn’t a brilliant day to start with, with weird dreams and small annoyances and I was absolutely wrung out by the end of the hour.

My focus right now is self care so when I got home I locked myself in the bedroom and just watched the rain fall. Consciously taking the time out to just stop everything for a bit.

I feel so much better now. I’m smiling again and happy and I feel like I’ve weathered a storm. There so much shifting and changing inside of me right now as I learn and grow. I also think that taking care of my needs is helping with the possible burn out.

Less than fourteen days and the con is on! I’m excited and terrified. If I can’t cope with a room full of people, how will I cope with a whole convention of them?